I alluded to some exciting changes coming our way a couple weeks ago, but now, I will let the cat out of the bag. I’m pregnant! Our rainbow baby is expected to join us sometime in late February or early March next year.
If you have been following me for a while, you know that I experienced a miscarriage last February. I wrote a post about the experience and another about taking time to heal from it – and one thing that I have learned in this all is that miscarriage and loss needs to be talked about more.
It is such a painful thing for a woman (and really a couple or family) to go through, it really should not be done alone. Yet, so many people feel that they cannot talk about it. And although I posted about it here, I am guilty of not talking about it much in person. It is painful to bring up, but it is also reassuring to know that we are not alone in our pain. There are many, many women who understand. The more I mentioned the experience to friends, the more friends I learned had been through it themselves. It was a kind of sisterhood, of sorts…
Time to heal
After my miscarriage, the doctor told me to wait a couple months before trying for another baby. I smiled and nodded, but I did not really understand his reasoning. He wanted to make sure I was completely healed, but mostly he was concerned that I had time to heal emotionally. He said that depression after miscarriage could lead to postpartum depression after a new birth if there was not proper time to mourn the loss. Only after living in a fog of depression for several months and finally feeling it lift completely this summer did I realize the wisdom of his suggestion.
My body was also not the same after my miscarriage. My hormones were off for several months and my cycles were strange. I gained weight and was not able to lose it no matter how hard I tried (which I believe was due to my hormone imbalance). Finally, in June, the fog started to lift and I finally felt more like myself. My cycles, which I chart, also normalized again and we conceived our rainbow baby.
Mourning into dancing
When I calculated the baby’s due date, I was pleased to discover that it was just days away from the day that our last little one was taken home into the arms of Jesus. It was like God was taking a day that was heartbreaking and replacing it with a time of joy. I really do see it as a gift from our Heavenly Father and I am so thankful. Our God is so good, my friends – so good!
You have turned for me my mourning into dancing; you have loosed my sackcloth and clothed me with gladness, that my glory may sing your praise and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give thanks to you forever! Psalm 30:11-12 ESV
Again, thank you for your faithful prayers and support during this time of healing for our family. It really does mean so much to me.
Oh! And, I can’t wait to give you all an update on my first trimester with a Trim Healthy Mama pregnancy. I really have noticed some really amazing differences I am excited to share with you!