For years I felt like my testimony was essentially worthless – it had no amazing story of redemption from horrific circumstances. I was not healed from disease or freed from a life of addiction. It seemed like everyone around me had amazing testimonies of God changing their lives drastically – but me? I had nothing special…
I was raised in a Christian family and accepted Christ as a young girl. I felt loved by everyone in my life and knew I was valued and special. I never rebelled; I never was abused. I loved Jesus and chose to go to a Christian college to study environmental science. I met my Jesus following husband in the same degree program and we married soon after we graduated.
I knew I was incredibly blessed, but I still felt somehow less of a Christian because I didn’t have a “great” testimony. So many others could bring a room to tears by God’s amazing transformation of their lives. What did I have compared to that?
I believed the lie that my testimony was essentially worthless for years and I let the devil keep me from sharing it. But thankfully, I was open to hear the truth. On my 30th birthday, I was at a women’s conference and we split into small groups to pray together. Some of the women had shared their testimony and I mentioned how amazing they were and how I didn’t have anything like that. What one wise woman shared with me really opened my eyes – she said I had a beautiful testimony of God’s faithfulness. I had deep roots planted in the fertile soil of my family’s faithfulness to Christ.
I felt like I was seeing my story with new eyes – I had never thought about it that way before. Now, as a parent, I realize that I have a beautiful testimony – one that I wish for my own children.
“They will not build and another occupy;
They will not plant and another eat [the fruit].
For as the lifetime of a tree, so will be the days of My people,
And My chosen [people] will fully enjoy [and long make use of] the work of their hands.
“They will not labor in vain,
Or bear children for disaster;
For they are the descendants of those blessed by the Lord,
And their offspring with them.”
God has been faithful and I cannot take credit for any of it. His faithfulness is to my parents and grandparents – their faithfulness and prayers and the way they chose to live out their faith to everyone around them was the firm foundation (or the rich soil) where my life was built. I never went through the trials of life that so many children must walk through. There is so much grace in this and a testimony to my parents’ wise choices. My parents worked very hard to build into me and my four siblings and taught us to love God and others and to care for creation. They taught me that I was a valuable and beautiful daughter – not just to them, but also to the King of Kings!
Don’t get me wrong, I have not had a perfect life and I am far from perfect – although thanks to Jesus’ sacrifice, God sees me that way! And thank you, Lord – my testimony is not worthless. I am not a boring story of “raised a Christian, always a Christian.” I am a testimony of Christ’s faithfulness which is exactly the testimony I hope for my own children.
Will this be my children’s testimony as well? I can’t say – although as their mom I want them to make wise choices and not be scarred by the sin of the world – but that may not be God’s plan for their lives. God uses us in different ways and uses our hurts and scars and past lives to build into others and show His power. It is amazing how the Creator molds broken things into beautiful masterpieces!
No matter your testimony, remember that you have one and that it is powerful and beautiful no matter how God brought you to Himself. Don’t believe Satan’s lies that your story is not as powerful as others. It is your story and tells a unique love story of God’s pursuit of your heart, no matter if it occurred at age five or 45 or 90. You are valuable and you are loved by the one who hung the stars in the sky. It is His desire to love you and be with you for eternity and that is something to be very excited about!
But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. 1 Peter 3: 15-16
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